l a n g u a g e a f t e r t h e 1 0 0 y e a r w a r
The Nouns were in control in the neighborhood of Verbiage.
Adjectives were forced to end their 100 Year War.
This war was known as the Great War of Planet Earth in the Days of Rhetoric Only.
Verbiage, like a fireplace bellows of yesteryear,
had simply exhausted its wheeze and could no longer
control the Nation.
Politicians would no longer be described adjectively.
Thus, our President could be described by the Press as, “A
man whose eyes narrowed when a syllabic word entered the
toy store of his mind; a man whose Rubber Ducky drowned
when his bath water became higher than what is necessary for
the average leader; or, a man who could bob eternally on the
Ocean of Platitude.”
This leader called up his country’s Reserve Marines again.
These Marines were sent to a land which resembled a cannon
to which they would become fodder. They would obey their
mission, climb into these cannons, and be shot out over the
land of buildings which no longer resembled buildings.
Naught would be seen but structures of rubble which resembled
cookies crumbled in the hand of a monster as tall as the
sky.
The Congress would not be allowed to use descriptions
which included the much abused adjective. This caused some
consternation, for our Congress knew of the paucity of adverbs
when running for election. The Congress member
would no longer be able to crawl into that vat of adjectives
filled with words guaranteed to portray an individual Congress
person righteously and puffily. These adjectives, I might
add, are thrown carelessly into this vat, like screen plays in
Los Angeles, like potato chips in a Lays truck which had escaped
from their Bag Containers.
The Nouns issued an edict: “Stick to the Facts, Jack.
Straight Facts for a Straight Land,” a land which had lived adjectivally
and splendiferously for too long, thereby wreaking
an ecological knowledge gap of a very long five years. Politicians
had appeared on the NewsHour program with Jim
Lehrer, and on what used to be Peter Jennings’s NewsHour,
and on Tim Russert, to reveal Sunday after Sunday (or was it
Monday after Monday?) narrow gamboling minds and nuances
of the political dance. These very same politicians verbally
trolled linguistically along to thinly expand titles such as
“Theatre of Operation,” “War Games” and, last but not least,
the most abused noun in the world, Democracy—Democracy
became a gutted, slutty word, misused and stretched like
hardened taffy in a candy machine after the summer crowd
had gone home.
A rape of the Nouns had occurred. What choice did the
Nouns have but to take over the Nation? They cried out,
“Aack, aack, aack! No more.”
And so as this tale is difficultly told, but blessed for its attempts,
all the while failing in adverbial splendor, time will tell how language
controlled its environment so that facts and integrity might emerge again
children of the world forget that “Truthfulness is the foundation
of all human virtues” (Ruhi Book 1 – Reflections on the Life of the Spirit)
Wow, Esther, this is fantastic! I can see soldiers soaring through the sky over ruined cities while literal letterbombs like As and Ps and Qs rain down. Back home ordinary citizens protest in front of government buildings; they link together in strings of compound words and wave signs like, “End Adjectivity!”
thanks; from book; it was fun to write; i’m having fun with writing, from book You Carry the Heavt Stuff; hugs and good blogging girl
i am pleased when others like my post – my smiles spreads into the room, up the walls, onto the ceilings, and down to the floor; gratitude
❤
Oh I get it! Took me a couple of reads but I’m not as green as I’m cabbage looking. 🙂 Very nicely written. Going to have to buy the book now.
smile-lulu.com, amazon, or me (i have storage of some)-if you decide to buy!
This is so fun! I hadn’t gotten to this one yet. 😉
LOVE “Verbiage, like a fireplace bellows of yesteryear.”
😉
This is just so sharp, and “wittily” fun. See what I did there? 😉
thanks will look later; you probably improved it immensely! hugs
No, I just meant see what I did with the adverb joke. wink, wink. 😉 I loves me some wordplay and you are really, really good at it. 🙂
A lesson in language meets political ciriticism. Quite amusing!
Thanks Besma; don’t know where and how my blog surfaced in your life, but I’m glad it did. I’ll follow yours now.
My heart smiles widely when people like my blogs – best wishes to you!
Very impressive.
high praise i think; gratittude
I really enjoy all the metaphors, wordplay and the images I can easily connect with especially the giant crumbling cookies. Great write Esther!
Thanks Hannah; hope all is well and creatively fertile
Thank you so much, such a great expression…creatively fertile!!
hello, ms. esther… the post above is another of my favorites among your posts. 🙂
btw, many thanks for coming over to my site, every now and then. i truly am glad… hope things are well with you and your loved ones… 😉
I am so pleased you like my stuff; i always click on when i see your posts; hugs for the day
[…] Sorrygnat – an American teacher in her 70s, a published writer and an exceptional conversationalist. She has been around, the world citizen tag she has given herself fits her to a tee. Here is somebody who has known hurts, pains and displacements and yet can talk about them lightly, glibly and happily. Her writings sound like you would want to be in her kitchen to tell her your problems while sipping some warm soup she herself has made. It will be a lively session, for sure. […]